-pinch nose-

My blog smells mouldy! haha.. seriously, i have absolutely no idea why i have this habit of neglecting my blog. That's because... i hardly go online at all!! -hmph-

At long last, i have the com all to myself: my bro has found work, at Island Country Club or something like that.. $6.50 per hr.. that lucky boy. well, u can guess, it's his 1st day of work today! He was telling me yesterday, he'll manage to earn about 1.4K if he worked an entire month: thinking so far when he hasn't even started work yet...

-sigh- I would like a job too! Just that i'm not so free yet. I've actually been thinking of giving tuition, but i'm not confident of teaching anything else 'cept Maths.. -bigger sigh-

Oh well, it's best to concentrate on school and CYF for now, and plus an ahem.. haha. -sigh- Speaking of CYF, my term ends tonight, along with 11 others. Come to think of it, the year has passed rather quickly, after so many sessions, after all our meetings, suddenly i can't bear to step down. But of course i will have to.. I guess it's a new responsibility from tomorrow onwards! Actually i don't feel that i've done much, especially when i was busy with work at the beginning of the year, and even after.. perhaps much of the enthusiasm has left me? The lack of energy and all.. All that's been done cannot be undone, and what's unsaid's been left unsaid.. ahhhhhh.. Whatever. Now, it's looking forward, not looking back.

There's still so much to do in December: school+assisgnments+test (yearning for that 1 wk break), caroling+pract, friends' birthdays, Christmas+celebration+presents.. and then there's orientation tomorrow. Woah, Jam-packed month is an understatement! I hope i still have some space to breathe..

Whoo! Just got my com back! i mean, my com crashed a few days ago! Luckily, my uncle came to help, and most of the stuff has been recovered, and almost everything's back to normal.. phew. Ain't i glad we didnt have send the cpu all the way to HP HQ to reformat.. that would have been the case if my uncle didnt offer to help man..

Anyway! The trip to Malaysia was fun! The food was great and i gained a good 1kg!! ahhhhhh!!! -screams at the new addition to the family of spare tyres- trying to lose the weight now.. but seems like once my appetite increases, it's so tough to get back into shape -like there was one in the beginning-.. -cries-

-sigh- sch's getting boring.. that's like a disaster, cos i'm aiming to do well for 1st year exams.. but that's in may 2005.. not too near, not too far.. but considered far more fortunate than nus-ers and ntu-ers i guess.. hahaha.. oops. lessons are getting quite out-of-hand as well.. with morning-class people going for afternoon classes (which they're not supposed to) and Meena lagging so much in math (cos we're starting stats soon --> math classes will end).. and me screwing up my accounts assignment.. -SIGH- things are sure not looking gd, but i guess i'll get by.. >_-

3 more days to Malaysia.. hm.. i don't sound exactly very excited huh.. maybe that's cos i've been waiting so long that the excitement's going down? it's more of feeling nervous now.. imagine facing so many people you've never met before at one go...

uh oh.. maybe i haven't told that many people.. i'm going to malaysia with my other-half, back to his hometown for his cousin's wedding dinner.. so i'll be gone from 7th - 11th Oct (thurs night to mon morning)

no worries about it.. got my parents' permission, and i know how to take care of myself. yup. will be back in time to rest and then go for accounts lecture..

i'm supposed to start packing today.. but i dunno why.. maybe cos i'm not feeling so well.. or maybe it's the few tiffs we went thru this few weeks.. i mean, i'm not the kind who gives up easily, so a few quarrels here and there doesn't get me down.. but i don't want to go to malaysia without making sure that we're alright, that I can forget and put all those quarrels behind me and not think so much about them for a few days.. i dunno..

just yesterday i was replying his letter.. wrote all my feelings down.. but now i'm not so sure whether i should continue writing or tear it up. i'm afraid that he might feel that i'm the one who keeps complaining about his faults yet i'm the one who's hurting him.. i just don't know where to start now and what to write..

forget it.. i should just try to forget it now and start packing.

i'm back! been at home all day.. with nothing much to do.. actually i do have my soci test to study for, but it's so dry i can't stand taking another look at the notes.. urghh. -yawn- feeling kinda lethargic and exhausted these few days.. even though this week's a break from sch. oh yea, í'm so bored i just repainted my nails!! hahaha.. i am sooo BORED! -stares at fingernails- hm, they're a nice pale pink.. hehe.

-sigh- i was supposed to send email out just now, but the stupid server was down.. now how am i going to explain myself.. hmph.

-yawn- maybe i should just go wash my brain with a little of kid's central for awhile.. hee..

gosh. refurnishing and "reopening" of blog!
isn't that refreshing.. :)

however, i've not much to blog.. life's pretty much a routine, now that uni has started. (it's been a month already! how fast time passes!) school's like the past, i mean, it's A level style. Tons of readings to be zapped (Sharn! i wish u were here to persuade the photocopying auntie to zap entire books for us!!) haha, anyway there isn't a photocopying auntie, so there. i'm sure i'm a certified photocopying lady in the making, along with chelle..

i was on the bus with grace on sat, (cos we've got math in thee morning) and suddenly we were missing the times we spent in SA, i ,mean, with our super fun and enthu and loud classmates! maybe we should have a class reunion again soon.. hm. but with the girls busy with school and the guys "slogging their guts out" in ns, i wonder who'll have the time?

well, even if school work doesn't get us down, i've still got church.. and someone whom i need to see every night before i go to bed.. haha. maybe i'll talk about him some other time; just what is good to know is, we're happy.. that's really good enough for the moment in time, i guess. :)

will try to update "new" blog regularly (somehow), but gtg for now..

.
.
.

ok, i didn't stick to my plan..

now the teaching job's off, and i'm back to sakae bugis.. it's kinda sad actually, i do miss the kids.. should've taken their pics before i left.. now they're only just a memory..

so far, i've started at bugis for only 2 days.. actually i shouldn't be going back there, but maybe i just didn't want to change environment.. it felt quite good to see familiar faces anyway.. also, work shouldn't be much tougher since i'm already used to it.. haha.

btw, checked out ACCA courses last week.. ok, they're internationally recognised, but they may have a slightly higher tuition fee on the whole and it's more difficult than accountancy at ntu.. most of the students there take the ACCA course as an additional skill, for example, ntu students taking ACCA course part-time.. furthermore, even if i do get the degree, i'm not sure if i'll get a job easily with it.. seems like ntu degrees get u into a job faster, in singapore that is! gonna check out other alternatives soon, like university of london..

argh, what's gonna happen if i don't get into ntu? i mean, they're (local unis) not the only universities around, but it'll definitely make things easier if i did get in. argh argh argh. this is frustrating.

.
.
.

oh, did i tell anyone i cried quite badly during Passion Of The Christ? hee...

oh well, work's been ok! am glad sakae work is over and that i'm quite enjoying myself at PCF Nee Soon Central's PAP Kindergarten.. currently helping some teachers with the nursery and K1 classes.. i'm not ready to take over the classes though, so i'm mostly observing lessons and all. so far i've learnt that kids can be real cute and mischevious.. and there are some who really do not deserve your sympathy. haha. there seriously exists spoilt brats who disgust me.. ugh. oh well, i'm wondering how long i'll be there.. i'm giving myself a few more weeks just to make sure i don't make a wrong decision. come to think of it, it's thanks to God that i managed to get this teaching job.. He's answered my prayers alright.. hee.

oh ya. i've also applied to work as a part-timer at Sakae.. again. this time it's bugis.. didn't really think of getting a second job after the kindergarten job, but recently i thought something bad was gonna happen so i had to save for a rainy day.. part-time over at sakae has not been confirmed, so meanwhile i'll jus continue teaching while waiting for bugis' news..

gonna return to choir as well.. seems like life's gonna be really busy huh. waiting for ira to go back for choir pract together.. and i gotta get ready for june's session as well.. hm, i should be able to juggle everything, i hope.

ooh, gotta check out ACCA about their courses as well.. i should be studying part-time while working.. cos i guess my chances at ntu's gonna be very slim.. might as well decide whether i'll be taking the accountancy course or the teaching course... yup, results are not good so i have to find alternatives, don't i?

okiez, gotta go soon. manager from bishan's leaving for the funan branch tomorrow, so tonight's the farewell party..

.
.
.

ok. i've officially resigned from sakae sushi.. tendered on 2nd april, day after april fool's. i actually intended to resign on april fool's day, but i thought my manager wouldn't believe me.. ha. well, as i've told quite a lot of people, my last day of work will be on 16th april, this coming fri.. yays.

besides my resignation, there's a big thing that has happened.. i haven't told many people, and i don't really intend to announce it to everyone.. just feel like keeping it down and all, and wait till it has settled.. shhh for those who know..

now i have to start thinking about other stuff, such as my next job.. hm. i wonder what kind of experience a kindergarten teacher would get.. i dunno if there's still a place for me, but what i know is, my dad's friend who is the principal had offered me a chance to teach the kids at his kindergarten school.. (now i really see the wonders God can do) which is somewhere in yishun. i'm excited at the prospect of teaching the kids, especially my fav subs like math, art, or even english or chinese! it sounds like fun, but i'm sure teaching is not just about providing knowledge but also about passion and patience. for all i know, the kids could be so playful and rowdy they'd be giving me headaches everytime i see them.. haha. if there is really still a place for me at the kindergarten after my last day at sakae, i'm sure teaching will help me partly in choosing my career path: accountant or teacher. if i cant handle kinds nor teach with passion, i seriously won't consider teaching to be a career option. it's much too risky for kids to get a boring and she-doesn't-know-how-to-teach teacher. i vaguely remember a teacher from ij who told us that it's not the teachers who are important, it's yourself. it's only partly true, cos i feel that, without a teacher with love for teaching and love for the students, including having good communication skills and knowing how to teach (that's very important), most students wouldn't understand the subject.. at least for me, that is. (i better not mention names)

enough of my "teaching" thoughts.. btw, it's Easter Sunday already! Happy Easter everyone! we should rejoice for our Lord has risen! i feel that this yr, even though i've been buried in work, i've at least found time to prepare myself for Easter.. through Lent, even though it was kinda last minute this yr, i managed to do my reflections and confession. i'm the lazy kind who goes for confession when the time calls for it.. i admit that. but this yr, it feels kinda special. after confession (or rather, penance) i felt more relieved and sorta felt like i was a new me. even though the confession lasted shorter than the previous yr, i'm glad i put my heart into it, especially the prayer after. i've come to know it's the amount of effort we put into trying not to sin that counts.. to feel guilty about our sins are not enough, cos we can't keep giving ourselves the excuse that "the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak" so that we can continue to sin. we have to remember our faults and make sure we try our best not to sin.. that is how i feel i can prepare myself.. if i truly love the people around me, i wouldn't keep hurting them, in either words, thoughts or deeds.. sounds familiar eh..

hm, that reminds me of "Passion of the Christ".. will blog abt it next time round.. gotta catch sleep or else i won't be able to catch the 11am mass tom with archie.. haha. oops. i mean the archbishop.. zzzz...

.
.
.

been thinking alot lately.. about work, about school (applications, that is), about family, about my faith.. maybe it's because i'm not making enough time for God, that's why things don't seem so right. yet God has been helping me in mysterious ways..

i went for Praise and Worship session (it was great and everyone truly enjoyed it), some of the songs got me thinking, and i thought i got depressed for a while.. well, God answered my prayers. uncle david came down and we chatted for quite a while, and he asked me how i was doing and all.. so told him about my grades and he gave me all the advice i needed with regards to uni decisions. only a few days before session i actually wrote a letter to Mother Mary asking her for help and her prayers, and even though i havent sent it, i'm almost thoroughly relieved that my problems are solved.

one down, many more to go..

recently i've started to realise that perhaps sakae isn't the job for me. i've spent all of my energy and commitment on work and all it has was take me away from God and my family. i mean, the money is useful, i can help relieve my parents on the financial side, etc. but i realise i cant make it down for sessions, meetings and even stations of the cross during this yr.. i'm still in a dilemma.. was supposed to hand in resignation letter yesterday, but i thought i let my colleagues and asst manager talk me out of quitting so soon. i tell myself i'll work for another week or so, if things are still going bad i'll have to resign, no matter who says what. besides, my mom has been bugging me to find another job, but sometimes it's not that easy, and i don't think she understands me on this point. much has happened ever since collection of A's results..

i suddenly feel i'm at one of my greatest turning point in my life.. everything jus seems so tense, my decisions are a mess, here and there, not complete, not firm enough. the pressure is starting to add onto me, and i feel like i need a shoulder to lean and cry on..

there was another incident that happened this week.. on the night before i wrote the letter to Mother Mary, my dad atarted throwing all the dinner and whatever was on the table to one corner of the kitchen. i didnt witness it, cos it happened like 5 mins before i returned home from work, but it was a damn big mess. glass and porcelain all over the kitchen floor and both my mom and my brother were jus cleaning everything up. i was momentarily stunned at what my dad did. i mean, he never ever threw things before and i think job has drove him to a limit.. probably not jus job alone cops my mom was nagging at him for not guiding my bro to get his freaking hands off the keyboard. everytime i think of my family now, i have tons of problems pooping up in my mind.. my dad and his work, my mom gving me stress, my brother refusing to wake up from his addiction to the com..

i just feel somehow, helpless. and undecided. perhaps God will clear the road for me..

finally updated blog layout.. but not completed yet..

i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis... i wanna go back to bugis...

.
.
.

I Love Sneakers!

Sneakers- funny, laid-back, and goofy, you love to
make people laugh and have a good time. You
enjoy comfort and don't care to much about what
people think of you. You like to hang out with
your buddies and just have a good time. [please
vote! thank you! :)]


What Kind of Shoe Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

.
.
.

phew. seems like i'm bloggin for the first time in my life.. hee.
i seemed to have left my blog hanging ever since work became a part of my life.. and i'm not sure if i like it..
i think work has left other responsibilities hanging as well..
btw, for those whom i havent told, i've been transferred to the Bishan outlet. it's been almost a week since i've started work there.. first few days at Bishan had been HELL. seriously, i missed Bugis and the peeps there like crazy.. work would be so different without them.. and mu..

well, i dunno if i can survive this week. if i can, it sure means i'll be permanently situated at Bishan, and goodbye to Bugis..

oh no, results coming out next week. i have a bad feeling i'm going to retake my A's.. or rather a premonition.. -shrug- i'm hoping to enter uni though..

ok, gotta go work soon.. (again)

.
.
.

-sigh- i'm tired. sleepy. muscles aching. toes hurting.
i wonder why today was such a taxing day at work.. perhaps it's a public hol, but we've been through that before.. i mean those busy times.. i'm surprised that all of us had gotten so tired by dinner time.. maybe because there weren't that many people today..

and i'm still depressed. and i haven't got the guts to tell my mom. and i won't be clubbing for about a month at least (most probably, unless i can get over it so quickly). this is so exasperating. i pray my stuff could be found... $200 freakin plus bucks, when will i ever earn it back? plus all the sentimental stuff?!?!?!

i do not want to think anymore. i'm going to sleep.

.
.
.

ok.. so what's wrong with the shoutbox????? playing hide-and-seek?

hm, actually i don't exactly feel like blogging.. but since i'm online.. i mean rarely online...

there's nothing i can talk about mostly, except work, nowadays. and work's been... work. quite fun in a way i get to know new people, although 90% are younger.. -_- it makes me, i dunno, feel younger? think younger? talk younger? i'm definitely not a 19 year old at work.. haha. all of them never thought i'd be 19.. (ok so do i really look that young? cant be the new hairdo) but we click well, all of us are united against one person.. one of the manager trainee aka Pighead or Spiky, etc. -lol- yesterday, we were even suggesting a riot against him.. haha. hm, i feel especially chatty during work, probably cos it tends to be kinda boring when there's no one in the restaurant (the bugis outlet is considered large-scale) and for eg, yesterday, there were like 10 staff to 2 customers for a short period of time.. gee. but don't get the idea that the place is always that empty.. cos we often get full-house in the evening.. and for those working the closing shift (2.30-11.30pm) like me.. will have to get real busy..

i wonder when's the test.. i definitely have to excel it of cos, or i'll get the sack. haha.. anyway the test was supposed to be on tue.. but it's already fri.. hm. and i wonder when mu and i will be transferred to the toa payoh outlet.. actually i won't mind if we don't, cos i've grown to like the bugis outlet.. with xiao pei our supervisor and alex our asst manager.. maybe i should ask xiao pei whether i could stay.. heh. since bugis is not really that far for me.. (even though mu and i have been discussing how we can walk or cycle to toa payoh if we were transferred there >_<)

ok, enough talk.. it's my off day today and i'm not spending every min in front of the com! i'm going out!

.
.
.

Happy Chinese New Year's Eve everyone.. (even though it doesn't feel like CNY to me..) wonder why the new year spirit hasn't permeated the air this year? maybe it's because most of my friends are working, and i'm not looking forward to going to my paternal relative's house.. hmph. what does CNY really mean? new clothes? ang baos? spring cleaning? or does it entail being nicer to people around you, especially your loved ones.. doing a bit of sacrificing for them and such.. just food for thought..

funny that CNY feels so much different this year.. no trips to chinatown, no one coming over to my place, i'm not even feeling excited.. worse thing is, SAT is on 2nd day of CNY.. to add on to that i gotta go for work... -sigh- now it's work, work and more work. no more crazy shopping, watching movies, free afternoons.. just work. and maybe no more sessions.. but i'll try to get a morning shift on a fri..

oh yea.. work means no more clubbing as well.. but there's a chinablack party this sat.. but i'm night shift.. hm.. contemplating..

hm.. i've survived a week at Sakae.. so far so good.. except for a fall a few days ago and yesterday's closing. tiring is not even enough to describe how i felt after that.. but i won't quit. i've decided to stay till june/july and i will do it, but not necessarily full-time.. if i can't juggle work and church at the same time, i'll opt for part-time, even if it means less pay.. i felt bad for not being able to attend last week's core team meeting, but i hope i won't have to miss the next one.. camp's coming up as well, and i don't have much idea about what i'm assigned to do.. hmm.. sometimes work really takes the time and life out of you..

oh talking about work.. i met Peiwei at far east yesterday. mu, weiling and i were shopping for auyong's present, then i realised Peiwei was working part-time at Blizz.. somehow almost everyone's having an easier job than mine.. -sob- well, i ended up buying a bottle of moisturiser from her.. haha. (c'mon, who doesn't know my weakness?)

-sigh- the only thing on my mind now should be SAT.. argh. which i'm totally unprepared for. jan 24th never seemed so near before..

.
.
.

whee! guess who i had lunch with yesterday!! i was with Sharn.Sharn!!! we were supposed to meet at wheelocks at 1.15pm.. i was late as usual.. oops. >_< anyway! we squeezed into a very crowded N.Y.D.C., and talked and talked and talked.. and of cos ate and ate.. haha. this lunch is truly one of the best i ever had!! thanx sista! -big hug- and we're so going back there again right? (we have to have the desserts the next time...)

oops! i totally forgot to post the good news.. not wonderful, but good.. yup. I'M EMPLOYED! starting training this coming tuesday.. for 2 weeks.. after i graduate (i assume i'll be! :P), i'll be posted to the toa payoh branch.. Sakae Sushi. yays. it pays ok.. ok job better than no job! anyway i need the experience, as much as possible! i was quite nervous when i spoke to mona yesterday.. cos i had to commit till july and the job required me to work on the weekends.. and both shifts cut right into choir.. my nerves were uncalled for anyway.. mona's always an understanding choir mistress..

oh yea.. back track to fri.. had a really great time with jo and ira! we went back to ij to visit the teachers.. but we were quite a distraction cos we were searching the whole sec 3 and 4 blocks for ms jac yip.. every class we passed i saw familiar faces, basically cos three-quarters of the female population in CYF and choir are in ij tp. hahaha. i'm not kidding. thereafter we found ms jo teo walking briskly towards her staff room.. she really lost a lot of weight! too bad she was rushing to class, or we could've grabbed her for a chat.. and we did find ms yip.. except she was rushing off to class as well.. that's for visiting ij during school hours.. anyway, we went up to the general office and ended up chatting for an hour or so with our principal ms theodora tan.. -sigh- my stomach was already growling like mad at that time, but all that talk actually made me forget i was freakin hungry.. of cos, we left ij determined to get good food.. (no point eating at ij canteen cos the old stalls were no longer there. otherwise, chiong the canteen food man) yays. swensons fish and chips was heavenly.. and the light mint sundae (with fudge...yum!) after that was just... drooo-licious.. we went to the one at ps btw. we had hoped to go to Fish and Co's, but it's ok.. we'll leave it for next time.. heh.

CYF: it was movie night for session.. everyone packed into the hot and humid CYF room (new aircon fittings weren't up yet) to watch "Dancing with the wolves".. which was one movie which i didn't quite get.. it was fun to watch the part about the red indians though.. it was basically a serious show with a little humour here and there.. i think the younger members weren't ready to understand the show, and i guess some of them were probably dozing off..(maybe until the red indians part haha) it was good nonetheless, even though i didnt get the whole story.. most probably gonna show the remaining movie next week after the session by Les, G bear, Kel and me.. we'll be presenting our pilgrimage to Rome! whee! exciting...

eeks. jus realised i haven started preparing for SAT on 24th.. argh. i think i'm gonna miss a day of training.. if there is training on saturdays.. weird huh. SAT on a SATurday. heehee.

well, guess that's about it for the week.. wonder why i'm not blogging much.. basically cos i cant even get the stupid com.. haha. gotta pry my bro off the com to use it.. serious. yesterday, i waited for my bro to get off the com till i fell asleep.. it's so what-the.. maybe i should seriously start making a roster. but as if he'll stick to it.... argh.

.
.
.

-hyperventilating-
i'm still excited from the butt-numbing, action-filled, noise-inspiring (only from me actually), last-part-of-the-trilogy tolkien movie.. LOTR - Return of the King!!!! i'm sorry for those who've watched it a million times since it's grand opening on... wad, 18 dec '03? well, i've FINALLY watched it TODAY!! (ok, call me a loser, whatever.. -roll eyes-) haha.. i've adopted this habit of asking lots of questions like "does the undead soldiers come after this???" or "why the hell is smeagol not dead yet?!" and then "omg! look at that! legolas is so handsome..." (at the part where he coolly slid off the elephant's trunk) -drool- and "omg! aragorn looks good too!" i think steph was super bugged by me, but oh well, what's done cannot be undone.. haha. i HAVE to get the dvd for LOTR man...

oh yea.. here's wishing shamu a very Happy (though belated) Birthday!!! i'm such a shithead for not wishing u on time.. sorry! fyi, i've known mu since.. we were born?!?! something like that yea.. cos we used to be neighbours and our moms knew each other.. and we've played together ever since.. whee.. mu and i have gone a long way.. from childhood neighbours to tuition mates, to ij mates, then to jogging/gym kakis (is this how it's spelled?).. she's always been there for me.. love ya mu! we gotta go gym sometime yea? :) cos i've been missing gym ever since i came back from rome.. argh. (oh yea, mu! i was so touched when u and ur mom sent me off at the airport! thankyou so much! -muackz-)

btw, onto a sad note.. i'm still JOBLESS. i consider that a disaster since my mom's been hounding about this.. i was so mad at her yesterday for scolding me about not getting a job. i was like wad the?!?! i've applied for 3 jobs already and she makes it sound like i havent even tried. i was so hurt by her words. she jus doesnt understand it sometimes, and she doesnt even think before she speaks.. (sounds like someone huh? haha.. joking) and she seems to be forcing me to get employed.. hey i'm not my own boss u know.. she jus makes it so difficult for me.. so far i've only told steph (i think) about my new year resolution.. if things are gonna get worse, i dunno how i'm gonna fulfill it. -pulls hair-

hm.. onto happier stuff.. (ok, not exactly happy, but ya) chinese new yr's coming! i hope mom/dad decides to buy the purple sofa case! and maybe we should start repainting some parts of the house where the paint is peeling.. and to really clean up the house.. to welcome the new yr! maybe to rearrange the furniture as well.. i hate it when people walk past our house and see everything that goes on in the living room AND the kitchen.. no privacy at all.. (nope! we're not closing the door! it's getting hot in here.. so take off... ahem) maybe i should do what steph has done for her door.. hang something to cover.. si? no? argh. my house needs a revamp!! my room needs a revamp!!

actually i'm quite excited for new yr.. i always have the notion that we should get new stuff.. haha. like a new hairstyle? new clothes? new shoes? some new furniture? new attitude towards life? new responsibilities??? something along this line... now that i'm onto new yr.. was thinking about having a chinese new yr party at my place.. wasnt really (actually, not at all) keen to visit some relatives.. and i guess it's either cyf or A51.. now that's a difficult decision.. but that is if my mom has no objection to it.. haha.

so... wait for the good news yea? if i'm lucky i may get both cyf and A51 to come.. haha.